Let's play the Movie Quote Game:

NO CHEATING.

1. Is it ok if I leave the couch? 'Cause I'm gonna leave the couch now, okay? My ass is falling asleep, so I gotta go. I'm leaving. Empire Records guessed by wasoncedelight

2. Let's go get the shit kicked out of us by love. Love Actually guessed by wasoncedelight

3. We are doing some serious shit here, now get a fucking hold of yourself. Boondock Saints guessed by exsequar

4. You're out with a guy, you find him attractive, and suddenly everything he says sounds brilliant. Hairy legs are your only link to reality. Return to Me guessed by sarahsaur81

5. This is an incredibly romantic moment, and you're ruining it for me. Pretty in Pink guessed by winterweathered

6. We're going to die and I'm wearing my mother's underwear. Grease 2 guessed by wasoncedelight

7. I don't want any flowers from you, I am not wearing black underwear, and I definitely do not want to move in with you. While You Were Sleeping guessed by loveflyfree

8. In case I forget to tell you later, I had a really good time tonight. Pretty Woman guessed by meinnim

9. I love to see a fat guy score.

10. For me, bullshit is like breathing.

11. I thought it was just an act, but you really are sweet as fucking pie aren't you?

12. Give me a scotch. I'm starving.

13. I wonder what grass tastes like.

14. The world's a playground. You know that when you're a kid, but somewhere along the way everyone forgets it.

15. I'm allergic to fabric softener. I majored in comparative literature at Brown. I hate anchovies. And I think I'd miss you even if we never met.

16. Every day people hitch to LA to stop movies from being made about them, but when we try and do it, it's like we're stuck in a fucking cartoon. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back guessed by cobalt_siren

17. Don't worry, I saw Lord of the Rings. I'm not going to end this 17 times. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang guessed by azewewish

18. This is my family. I found it, all on my own. Is little, and broken, but still good. Yeah, still good. Lilo and Stitch, guessed by cobalt_siren and wasoncedelight

19. I was hoping for a good night lay, but I'd settle for a good night kiss.

20. Scarlet's my middle name. My full name is Will Scarlet O'Hara. Robin Hood Men in Tights guessed by cobalt_siren

Yep.

So this week has been an exercise in DOING THINGS YOU DON'T WANT TO. ARGH.

I have worked every day 5:30am to 2pm. I am NOT a morning person and it has been HELL. Sunday night I could NOT sleep, I had the worst insomnia. I feel asleep at 2:30, only to have to get up at 5. I got home around 2:15, hung out for a little bit before giving up. I crawled into bed at 5:30pm and slept straight through until my alarm went off the following morning at 5am. And I have to do it all again next week. The reason is good at least, in that I was offered the "back up" position to the Customer Care Manager at work. So I have to spend the next four weeks learning enough responsibilities for four people and then I get to take a test. If I pass, I get a four dollar/hour raise. This is all very great, considering I am way overqualified and underpaid for the job I'm doing now, but the thing is, I will STILL be doing way too much work for way too little pay. Hopefully someday I'll consider myself worth more.

I'm just feeling incredibly disenchanted with this company.

Anyway, I guess I should see about heading to bed. Getting up at 5 is hard no matter how much sleep I've had.

Still, always and FOREVER my faaaavorite:



I'm feeling shmoopy. Forgive me.

I have 5500 words of Jealous Kyle for keepaofthecheez and I am STALLED. So obviously I need to watch more of them being the most adorable boys on the planet.

Remind me to come back and tell you about work and the good thing that happened last week. For now, I'm being beckoned.

I have a fondness for the Kennedy Center Honors. Any excuse to cry like a baby. I've always loved them for some reason. I've been watching Bruce Springsteen's segment from this year's Honors on repeat, for a bunch of reasons. I'm on Fire is one of my all time favorite songs, and I love Jennifer Nettles so when it turned out that she and Ben Harper (who's version of In Your Eyes is one of the most beautiful things ever) did it together for the show, I was really excited.

So I'm lying in bed watching Sting perform the Rising and I just feel like bawling because standing in the First Lady's seat is this stunning, beautiful black woman and her equally stunning husband and I just keep thinking, wow. How amazing. It's been a year and it still doesn't always feel real.

The other thing I feel I have to acknowledge is, I have the BIGGEST crush on Bruce Springsteen. It's a little unhealthy, actually. I don't think one should spend four hours on Youtube watching every live performance ever of his and LUSTING after a man old enough to be my father and then some.

It's tied to a whole bunch of things (my daddy issues for one, I'm sure) but Lord, he is sexy as hell. I remember being ten years old and every Friday night my dad would come home from work, take us out for ice cream and then we'd gather in the living room for concert night. We each got to pick a song and the stage was ours. We could do whatever we wanted. I always put on one of my twirly dresses and danced to something from Tracy Chapman's eponymous album. Sarah was still doing gymnastics at the time so she'd get into a leotard and do tricks on the makeshift floor beam my dad made for her out of two by fours and carpet scraps. We went oldest to youngest so Andy was third. He was six, then, and my dad would put on a Springsteen song, sometimes Born to Run, usually Tougher than the Rest. And he would go to town, spinning and doing this weird break dance thing he'd picked up who knows where. And then the babies would get one song together. I have this clear as day image of them in their footsie pajamas, Charlie and Willie almost four, Emily just two, dancing around the room to a Grateful Dead song. And my dad and mom just sitting together watching it all.

The saddest thing to me is that none of my siblings remember this. Sarah remembers the beam Daddy made for her, but everyone else was too young. I tell these stories to them, the ones I still remember, when they let me. Mom never talked about Daddy, you could tell it was too hard. She pushed it all to the back of her mind like something she was determined to forget. I guess that's how she kept going, she didn't think about the things that made her sad.

I haven't sat down and written about my dad in a long time, and I don't know that I ever have in any detail. Before my mom died, every single thing tied back to losing my dad. It was like my whole life, my personality, everything was tied to him and his death. And in the two years since my mom died, there's been this enormous shift and I've been so busy falling apart and trying to hang in there that I sometimes find myself looking at the pictures of him in my living room and it's like waking up. Oh, I remember you.

I used to be able to remember what he smelled like, the way his mustache felt when he kissed me goodbye, his crooked smile. Now I don't let myself think about it because I can't remember the details anymore. And now that Mom's gone, I worry about losing my memories of her, too.

I'm not really as melancholy as all of this sounds. I was lost in Bruce Springsteen and I felt like babbling.

IT'S BIG BANG SEASON, YAY.

I have a trillion ideas, but HELP WOULD BE NICE.

SO:

If you could make me write anything for spn_j2_bigbang, what would it be? (I should mention I'd most likely be writing Jared/Chad)

and

If you could make me write anything for bandombigbang, what would it be?

I doubt anyone on my flist is as cool as me and watches Teen Nick on Demand, but let me tell you what, that new show about four boys from Minnesota who become a boyband? GAYEST THING IN THE WORLD. I kid you not, within the first two minutes, they're throwing out "i love yous" to each other and wrestling and there's even a smack on the ass. It's so adorable and GAY. I've watched the pilot several times because CLEARLY I live for tween sitcoms especially those about a boyband. It's got mediocre acting and is pretty cheesy but the best thing about it is the chemistry between the guys. I don't know if the actors have known each other before this but they play off each other really well.

Someone come shoot me before I start ficcing.

kikiduck, you would be all over this show, I'm telling you.

Closer
One Life to Live
Kyle/Oliver
R
1800+ words
Summary: the morning after
Notes: Oh man, SHMOOP. And also, maybe this is dirty? I don't know, it's hard to tell anymore.

This is for keepaofthecheez. Because she listens to me freak out about these two. Because she has made the last few months so much fun. Because she loves them like I do. Because I love her.


( Closer )

Merry belated Christmas :)

I had the most amazing, wonderful Christmas, and I don't mind telling you that after my mom died, I was sure I would never say that again.

The month leading up to it, though, was so beyond stressful. I had no idea how I was going to pay for my plane ticket, how I was going to afford gifts, and I was just so anxious about the whole thing. But it worked out okay, as things usually do and it turns out I worry about everything for no real reason.

I left super early on Thursday morning from Raleigh Durham airport and got in to La Guardia at 8:30am. Andy picked me up and we spent the day in Greenwich, Connecticut at my cousins' (on my dad's side) house. We hung out and then saw an afternoon showing of Avatar in 3d. We had an early Christmas morning before getting on the road to New Haven to pick up my Granny and Aunt Kitty before driving up to West Hartford for lunch and presents at my Aunt Susan's house.

I don't even know what it was that made it so wonderful, but I think it was just everyone being together for the first time since the wedding, which was such a whirlwind that we didn't have time to just be together and talk or hang out.

We got back to New Haven around 5 and just spent some time before dinner playing games. Saturday was when the crowds descended. My aunt Carrie and her husband and five year old son, my aunt Amey, her husband and daughters (8 and 11), my great aunt Susie (granny's youngest sister), my great uncle Mike (granny's youngest brother) and his wife Nancy, and my Aunt Karin (my dad's brother's widow) and her two kids (the cousins we spent Christmas eve and morning with). It was 20 people all packed into Granny's house for dinner and MORE presents. My favorite thing in the world is a house full of people and that's what we had for three days. It was so wonderful and it was just a happy time. The last two Christmases were just so sad, trying to get used to having Christmas somewhere other than Mom's house, with people who weren't mom and my siblings. But this year felt like such a triumph, it was just a really fun time and I came back feeling so rejuvenated.

I was spoiled beyond words, especially by my aunt Susan. She's married to a trial lawyer who's made a very VERY successful living and she bought both Andy and Emily brand new Mac Powerbooks. I have a fairly new computer but she didn't want me to feel left out which was beyond generous. She bought me this Nikon Coolpix camera. It's AWESOME. Everyone knows how amazing my other camera was but it was almost 3 years old and kind of out of date now. I am so excited about this, because it allows me to focus more on my two favorite things in the whole world: my siblings and taking pictures of my siblings. She also gave me $100.00 to Barnes and Noble (which I'm having so much fun with), a digital picture frame, a digital picture frame key chain, and a gorgeous deep purple blazer from Talbotts.

My sister Sarah went and made me cry like a little baby. When she came to take care of me in June she was confronted with my obsession with journals. She had one made for me with a picture of me and my siblings at the wedding with the words "Family inspires me." But what made me burst into tears was this little stamp. It has six stars around "Loey" and it's for stamping the projects and cards I make. I was just so overwhelmed by how thoughtful it was. That a)she knows how much scrapbooking and cardmaking means to me, b)that "six" is special and c)stars. That pretty much sums it all up for me, and the fact that she paid attention and got it so right just floored me. And to make it better, my cousin Charlie (he's five going on fifty) decided to start his own business designing logos and he made a business card for himself and asked people to send him business cards from their towns so he could collect them. Sarah asked him to design the stamp. Isn't that so special? I'll have to take a picture, because it really is amazing.

On Sunday, the majority of us hiked up East Rock and had an impromptu photo shoot with my camera.

( pictures. )

I don't know if I've mentioned this here before or not, at least not in any detail, but my brother Andy has spent the last six or so months coming out to my family. I'm so proud of him I can hardly talk about it without bawling. My Granny has been really, really supportive which was a little surprising if only because she's nearly 80 and kind of set in her ways. But she's also fairly left leaning and progressive. Being in New Haven has allowed Andy to meet some gay guys his own age which is something I wanted for him, if only because I want him to have friends who have been through what he's going through and who he can relate to. One of these guys is this adorable German guy named Rafael. He's getting his Master's in History at Yale and his boyfriend, (also German) Sebastien goes to Washington University in St Louis and was visiting for the holidays since they couldn't afford to go home. They came over on Sunday for dinner and we spent two hours playing this awesome game called Buzzword. (if you like games and like family, I highly recommend this game.) As soon as they walked in the door, I took one look at them, grinned at Andy and said, "you guys are so CUTE." And then they all laughed because Andy warned them I get a little spastic. But we totally clicked and had such a fun time and I'm just so happy Andy has Rafael as a friend.

( Pictures of Rafael, Sebastien and Andy )

And that's all. I need to catch my breath.

I owe an actual post about life, about how wonderful my Christmas was, how amazing and beautiful my family is, maybe a year end wrap up, plans for 2010.

But that'll have to come later. My boss called me in early to work so instead of 3:30 to midnight and ringing in the new year at Kroger, I'm working 1:30 to 10 and will be home early enough to spend the New Year on my sofa.

Thank you so, so much to exsequar, foxxcub, azewewish, mayquee517 and gobsmackit for the Christmas cards. Thank you for thinking of me.

My December was a little crazy so Christmas cards will either be New Year's cards or Valentine's Day cards.



So. Yesterday. Yesterday, One Life to Live gave me my two favorite, sweet, SO IN LOVE boys MAKING LOVE. And it was amazing. My expectations were through the roof because I have too much time on my hands to think and come up with scenarios. But everyone involved, the actors (ESPECIALLY THE ACTORS), the writers, the producers, ABC, EVERYONE went above and beyond and it was so beautiful and INTENSE and full of love that I just wanted to cry.

I don't think there is an actor on daytime television as absolutely committed as Brett Claywell. You have this straight, North Carolina raised boy who clearly gave everything he has in portraying Kyle Lewis and how completely in love with Oliver he is. I couldn't BREATHE for how emotional it was. And then there's Scott Evans who is my favorite for everything and the way he played Oliver, a little teary, clearly overwhelmed, made me fall that much more in love with him.

I know most people don't care for soaps or this storyline, but please, do me (and yourself) a favor and ( Watch this. )

Beyond the fact that I'm in love with this couple and they have become my whole life in the last few months, I think it's pretty mindblowing, and incredibly important, that this scene aired not only on US television, but DAYTIME. What a huge step.

So. Since my plans for New Year's Eve have changed, I will be spending the evening after work writing Scott/Brett RPS and bothering keepaofthecheez because she listens to me spaz out and then makes my whole life by returning the spaz. I'm so lucky, you don't even know.

I don't even know what to SAY.

Watch today's episode and let me know if it's at all possible to NOT BE IN LOVE WITH THEM.



Someday I'll update about real life instead of going on and on AND ON about these two. Can't imagine when that will be.

Mini rant:

This is the third time a date has been posted for Kyle and Oliver to show up on One Life to Live and then they are NOWHERE TO BE SEEN.

It's incredibly frustrating and kind of makes me want to throw things. I do not give a crap about GiGi or Todd or blah blah Mitch Laurence, I don't want to sit through Farah Fath's crappy acting if I don't have to.

What's the point of posting air dates if they're all WRONG.

Look what I made!

It only took FOREVER and it's not very good since I don't have the faintest idea what I'm doing, but I MADE IT.

I know I've mentioned this song a time or twelve because I LOVE IT and because it's so perfectly Oliver and Kyle. Seriously, sometimes I just watch the entire storyline with this song playing on repeat, that's how much I love it.



download
Truthfully - Lisa Loeb

Day 01 → Your favorite song
Day 02 → Your favorite movie
Day 03 → Your favorite television program
Day 04 → Your favorite book
Day 05 → Your favorite quote
Day 06 → Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 07 → A photo that makes you happy
Day 08 → A photo that makes you angry/sad
Day 09 → A photo you took
Day 10 → A photo of you taken over ten years ago
Day 11 → A photo of you taken recently
Day 12 → Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 13 → A fictional book
Day 14 → A non-fictional book
Day 15 → A fanfic
Day 16 → A song that makes you cry (or nearly)
Day 17 → An art piece (painting, drawing, sculpture, etc.)
Day 18 → Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 19 → A talent of yours
Day 20 → A hobby of yours
Day 21 → A recipe
Day 22 → A website
Day 23 → A YouTube video
Day 24 → Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 25 → Your day, in great detail
Day 26 → Your week, in great detail
Day 27 → This month, in great detail
Day 28 → This year, in great detail
Day 29 → Hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days
Day 30 → Whatever tickles your fancy

Favorite Television Program
I should probably come up with something trendy or witty or cool, but that just wouldn't be me. My favorite tv show of all TIME is Mork and Mindy. What can I say, I can rewatch season one (especially) over and over, quoting it and laughing hysterically at every stupid joke. It just makes me happy. The acting isn't so great and it's kind of corny but it's sweet and heartbreaking at times and really hilarious. Good stuff.

Day 01 → Your favorite song
Day 02 → Your favorite movie
Day 03 → Your favorite television program
Day 04 → Your favorite book
Day 05 → Your favorite quote
Day 06 → Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 07 → A photo that makes you happy
Day 08 → A photo that makes you angry/sad
Day 09 → A photo you took
Day 10 → A photo of you taken over ten years ago
Day 11 → A photo of you taken recently
Day 12 → Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 13 → A fictional book
Day 14 → A non-fictional book
Day 15 → A fanfic
Day 16 → A song that makes you cry (or nearly)
Day 17 → An art piece (painting, drawing, sculpture, etc.)
Day 18 → Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 19 → A talent of yours
Day 20 → A hobby of yours
Day 21 → A recipe
Day 22 → A website
Day 23 → A YouTube video
Day 24 → Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 25 → Your day, in great detail
Day 26 → Your week, in great detail
Day 27 → This month, in great detail
Day 28 → This year, in great detail
Day 29 → Hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days
Day 30 → Whatever tickles your fancy

Favorite Movie
I hate this question because there isn't one simple answer. It used to be Dirty Dancing. I remember being seven the first time I saw it. Maybe that's a little young, I don't remember thinking anything but that it was just a FUN movie. Now, though, I'd say it's a movie called All Over the Guy. It's funny and romantic and angsty and very much like a fanfic I would want to read. It plays on my love for boys who are COMPLETE opposites and make less than no sense together but fall in love anyway, despite it not making any sense. There are very few good (and happy) gay films. Trust me, I've seen a LOT, and when I found this, it was like someone had made the PERFECT MOVIE FOR ME.

If you haven't seen it, you definitely should.

I couldn't resist:



(35 icons from today's episode)

Anyone who a)KNOWS ME or b)watched today's Kyle and Oliver show knows that I couldn't possibly be expected to shut up and go about my business.

So excuse me while I picspam.

( PICSPAM OF EPIC HOTNESS )

Okay. I think I'm done. For now.

Everybody should watch this right NOW.

AND THEN COME FREAK OUT WITH ME.

( Today's One Life to Live as I watch )

Okay, So The show is half over and I've made it through ten minutes because I keep pausing.

I'll be back with more after I watch the Nick stuff play out.

I'm wide awake and this looks really cool.

Day 01 → Your favorite song
Day 02 → Your favorite movie
Day 03 → Your favorite television program
Day 04 → Your favorite book
Day 05 → Your favorite quote
Day 06 → Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 07 → A photo that makes you happy
Day 08 → A photo that makes you angry/sad
Day 09 → A photo you took
Day 10 → A photo of you taken over ten years ago
Day 11 → A photo of you taken recently
Day 12 → Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 13 → A fictional book
Day 14 → A non-fictional book
Day 15 → A fanfic
Day 16 → A song that makes you cry (or nearly)
Day 17 → An art piece (painting, drawing, sculpture, etc.)
Day 18 → Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 19 → A talent of yours
Day 20 → A hobby of yours
Day 21 → A recipe
Day 22 → A website
Day 23 → A YouTube video
Day 24 → Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 25 → Your day, in great detail
Day 26 → Your week, in great detail
Day 27 → This month, in great detail
Day 28 → This year, in great detail
Day 29 → Hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days
Day 30 → Whatever tickles your fancy

Favorite song
Is this supposed to be favorite song of the moment or of all time? Let me try to explain this. When I was maybe nine or ten, my parents only let us watch public television so we watched a lot of Sesame Street, and the same episodes over and over that my dad taped for us. Forever I was obsessed with Smokey Robinson singing You Really Got a Hold on Me with a giant Muppet U crawling all over him. It kind of creeped me out and I was weirdly fascinated with it and ever since I have really loved that song.

( Wow, Youtube is weirdly amazing so you can watch it here )

A couple of years ago Cyndi Lauper released the most amazing album of covers and recorded the song. Only it's nothing like Smokey's version. One of my favorite things in the world is covers, especially covers that turn the song upside down or make it a completely new song. Mary Beth Maziarz's version of Daydream Believer is a perfect example of that.

So I guess all that rambling is to say that my favorite song is Cyndi Lauper's cover of You Really Got a Hold On Me. It's haunting and gorgeous and her voice, which I have always loved, has never sounded more beautiful or such a perfect fit for a song. You can listen to the original if for some reason you've never heard it.